


Womanizer

by SebsLips



Category: Bucky Barnes - Fandom, Captain America (Movies), James Buchanan Barnes - Fandom, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Seb/reader - Fandom, Sebastian Stan - Fandom, Winter Soldier (Comics), seb stan - Fandom
Genre: Bucky Barnes Has Issues, F/M, Sebastian Stan - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-14
Updated: 2016-07-14
Packaged: 2018-07-23 23:30:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7484208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SebsLips/pseuds/SebsLips
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Reader</p>
<p>POV: You</p>
<p>Disclaimer: All photos, videos, names, places, events and other stuff mentioned are not mine. The only thing that's mine are the plot.</p>
<p>Warning: Be warned that some of these involves mental illnesses such as depression. But I will try to make cute and fluffy ones too. ❤</p>
<p>--<br/>Please follow this wattpad acc.: @SebsLips</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part 1

Part One  
\----

"I left her! I swear, I did. For you... I love you. You know that right?"

Sebastian explains, reaching for your hand as he talks. You flinch away at his touch but that same soft, comforting skin on skin is what you crave for. He pulls you in, and wraps his hands around your waist. He stares down at your tear stained face, sighing. He says, "Right?"

Honestly, you don't know what to think anymore. You don't know which is worse; him cheating.. Or you, actually considering taking him back. The latter is much worse, you know he's a mess and reckless. He'll do anything to get you back, not in the way you want to. Sebastian is the kind of man who's insatiable, he's never contented with what he has in his grasp. Even with his women.

Just last week you found out he was seen at the bar talking, no.. flirting with two women. That was just last week, who knows how long he's been stabbing you on your back, you have been together for a year now, no way in hell did he ever gave any sign that he's a cheater or a downright asshole. But alas, here you are now, torn between leaving him or giving him another second chance.

"Look, I gotta go Seb. It's getting really late and I still have work tomorrow. I'll just.. maybe.. call you." You say, your eyes shifting down in shame, because why.. why would you even consider calling this man... this poor example of a man. Why?

Why? Because when you said you'll call, his eyes lit up like fireworks in the sky, his smile widens, like a gleeful child after school. His stature changes into a confident and happy manner. Why? Because when you see him like that, you remember the first time you laid your eyes on him, that one spark in the hotel lobby you're working at, you remember how his stubble outlined his defined jaw, you remember how he loved you too much he was ready to give up his life when you broke it off. You remember how vulnerable Sebastian is, and you remember how he used to love you and treat you like a queen. 

That's why, because you remember how he was before all of this. That's why he's hugging right now, tight, warm and comfortable, as you were about to leave. He whispers, "Please... call me."

And you just responded with a, "For sure, Seb."

Just like that, you're under his spell again. One of the women he manipulates. You shake your head at yourself as you walk away, you can feel his eyes still staring at you from behind, it was a cold night and the rain had just stopped, the ground was wet and the faint smell of dew that made the night more gloomy than it should be. You put the collar of your raincoat up for warmth, that was when you heard a sound of someone running behind you and it gets closer and closer, you turn around and..

It's Seb, he quickly gives you a kiss on your seemingly chapped lips. It was long, and relaxing, you almost feel like falling in his arms but he pulls away, and plants a kiss on your forehead, he whispers "I love you, believe me, that part is true."

And he pulls away, smiling apologetically at you, and turns away, walking to the opposite direction. You stand there, shocked and confused. But you smiled, because you believed him.. your naive self believed a womanizer like him. And once again, just like that, he doesn't just have you under his spell, he's got you on his personal leash.

\---

Follow me on Wattpad: @SebsLips


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Tumblr: iownbuckybarnesass.tumblr.com  
> Wattpad: @SebsLips

PART TWO  
\---  
"Oh, come on, it's one dance! No big deal!" Chris exclaimed on the other end of the phone.

Chris is one of your co-workers at the hotel, you two are practically bestfriends. Chris is a hopeless romantic who's stuck in the vicious cycle of the friend-zone. And, just your luck, the hotel decided to host a ball in the event center, everyone is obliged to come, even the staff. Basically, you will be treated as guests, it's a little thank you from the company so we won't quit on them. So now, not only do you worry about Sebastian, you will worry about this stupid dance too.

"Fine, Chris, I will!" You laugh, because you can never resist Chris, ever.

"Yes!! Thank you so much! Wear a nice dress, okay? I'll see you!"

"Yeah, okay. Bye, Chris."

You hung up, and all of a sudden you get this sinking feeling, because now that the call with Chris ended, you have to call Sebastian... and honestly, you were just procrastinating, just avoiding that scenario altogether. You wonder if you will do it, you look for reasons why, and... you can only think of one thing. Because you love him. Still... Even when he screwed you over, threw you aside like some dirty bitch. You didn't deserve that, right? 

But maybe.. it's your fault too? Workaholic woman, who never has time for herself or anyone else. Let alone for Sebastian. Is it your fault he's acting out like an immature ass? 

You scroll through your contacts and you see that name, your finger hovers over the call button... and like it's the hardest thing you did, you pressed it.

Ringing.. Seems like never-ending ringing.

*Hey, it's Sebastian--*

"Seb, first of all, I gotta ask--"

*--I'm not on my phone yet, please leave a message and I'll get back to ya.*

That irritating beep ended and you hang up. Tears gently sweep through your cheeks, onto your lap. That gut wrenching feeling just eating you from the inside, like a worm crawling from your stomach to your throat. In one snap, you're sobbing hysterically, standing up and throwing your phone across the room, pushing the chair so violently that it falls over. Your back against the wall, and you slide down, crouching, hugging your legs and crying. 

'Why is this happening to me? Do I deserve this kind of torture? I have been nothing but good!!' You think to yourself.. Your sobs turned into screams of pain, sorrow... 

"You can't torment me like this, Sebastian!! What gave you the right?!" You scream, as loud as you can. You see the neighbor's light turn on, a shadow looking through their curtain but you ignore it. You cry, and scream, hitting your fists on the linoleum floor.

Seems like your whole world just came tumbling down from the high horse it was on. In one moment, everything was perfect, the next; it's all fucked. You began to question everything, even yourself. You're in a state of paranoia and you feel your skin crawl with just the thought that right now, Sebastian might be fucking another woman. 

With your energy draining and your body giving up, you try your best to stand up and get yourself a bottle of whiskey. Something to numb the pain. Something to make you hate yourself even more. Something to help swallow Sebastian's name stuck down your throat, the name you can't seem to swallow but you can never spit out either. 

Why do you do this to yourself?

Suddenly, you hear a knock on the door.. You try to stand up, with all your might, you've drank at least almost half of the bottle, and your vision is blurry, you stumble. You reach the door and opened it.

"Oh my god, what... What did you do to yourself??" A familiar voice echoed in your head.

"Seb?" You say, your voice hoarse and tired.

"No, it's Chris...."

\--


	3. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Tumblr: iownbuckybarnesass.tumblr.com

"Chris??? From work?" You mumble, followed by incoherent slurs just spilling out of your mouth.

"Yes, it's me! What the hell happened to you? I tried calling you again and I couldn't reach your phone so I got worried, drove here as quick as I could." Chris explained, carrying your weight on his shoulders, he enters your home and sat you down to the couch. 

"Sebastian is what fucking happened to me." You said, laying your head on Chris' lap, and closing your eyes. You feel his hand run through your hair repeatedly, and just by that, you almost fell asleep.

"I know, I know... I hope he realizes what he's done. I wish he could see you right now. Maybe it can change his mind." Chris said quietly, hands still running through your hair. You just laid there, eyes closed and head buzzing. 

Yeah, you wish that too.

~  
Two days later.

"C'mon!! Let's go! We're gonna be late!!" Chris yelled cheerfully, sporting his fancy suit and tie, his hair all fixed up. Man, he cleans up good.

"Alright!! Geez, man. You gotta chill. It's not like we're VIP there!" You yelled from upstairs, you were fixing your hair. You took one step back and looked at yourself in the mirror, red silky cocktail dress, pearl necklace, white gloves, and a black stilettos. Then your eyes moved up to your face, suddenly you feel sick. Because one thing's for sure, Sebastian is going to be there. He's one of the co-owners of one of the bars in the hotel, no way in hell he'll miss that ball.

And a quick look at yourself, you realize, you don't look good enough like you used to. Tears welled up on your eyes and slowly made its way on your cheeks. And what's worse is your mascara is running. 

"Come on. We're already ten minutes behind." Chris said from behind you and stopped when he saw the tears on your face. "You know, I'm not taking you to that ball if you look like the lovechild of Joker and Harley with that mascara running down your face." He said jokingly.

He turns you around to face him, and you look down in shame. You smile because you know he's just trying to cheer you up.

"It's all going to be fine..." He said, as he wipes away your tears with his thumb. "...we'll just sit there if that's what you want."

You shake your head, "No, no.. We've been looking forward for this ball in days. I've no right to ruin it for you." You said, turning back to the mirror, fixing yourself up. There's no point in crying, so you might as well just suck it up.

~  
At the ball.

You see this beautiful event, but your eyes roam around the room, trying to find Sebastian without being too obvious.

"He's there, at that table. At our table? Fuck.. I'm sorry I didn't know!! We could switch up wi--" Chris panicked but you quickly stopped him, 

"It's fine, Chris. Let's just go sit. It'll be fun."

"O-oh.. Okay?"

You walked cautiously to your table, hand in hand with Chris. You smile, seems so calm but your insides are turning and you feel like your face is melting. You reach the table. Smiling at everyone but avoiding eye contact with Sebastian. Chris got the idea, and went with it, he pulled the chair and urged you to sit. And you did, gently grabbing hold of his arm.

Then you see Sebastian in your peripheral vision. You can see his eyes, raging with jealousy. And that made you smile, you turned to Chris and whispered nothing, of course Chris knew what you were trying to do. And he laughed, you did too.

*Eh-ehm*   
You hear from across the table, all eyes fixed on Sebastian. He stares at you, trying to create a connection but the tension in this table is too much. He speaks,

"So, Chris, I heard you just got dumped by that girl from the accounting?"

Chris looks at you in confusion, "Uhh, yeah, Sebastian. I-uhh.. we broke up... Two weeks ago."

"Oh! Is that so?? How come I see you comin' in here and flirting with MY girlfriend?!" Seb yelled, making sure that everyone on the table heard.

"Sebastian! What the hell is wrong with you?!" You defended, looking at him and urging him to stop.

"Oh, I don't know, maybe because we haven't even broken up yet, and you're here laughing and flirting with this asshole!" Sebastian exclaimed, pointing his hands on Chris, you can't even begin to explain how embarassed you are. Good thing the room is so noisy that yelling a little too loud will not cause a commotion.

"When I flirt with other people, you get so angry and jealous! But when YOU fuck other women behind my back, you say I'm the crazy one?! And no, we are not flirting, Sebastian..." You said quietly, but loud enough for the whole table to hear. You stand up and collected your things. "...how dare you even say that to me. You don't have the fucking right to hurt me like this."

And with that said, you leave the event hall. Because seeing Sebastian like that, all jealous and worked up. It hurt you, it should've been him you're flirting with. But instead, he makes a move like that. What an asshole. You take your keys from your purse and head to your car, and you just sat there, hands on the wheels and pouring your heart out, tears and soul. 

You're tired of crying, tired of being in this state. You just want to break free. You don't want this life anymore. But a tap on your window snapped you out and you look up to see Sebastian, his eyes screams 'Sorry' and the way he's looking at you left you in a trance, you roll down the window.

"What do you want?" You sobbed. Wiping the tears still falling down your eyes.

"I want to fix the damage I did. Not to redeem myself, but to help you be okay again. Look, I can see what you're going through, and you know I still love you-"

"Bullshit" you cut him off.

"Say what you want, but I really do. It pains me to see you so... Broken. Please.. Let me fix you." He said, leaning on the car, never breaking eye contact. "And I am sorry. For causing you this much damage.. Everything fell apart, I don't know what happened--"

"You're a fucking cheat, is what happened Sebastian."

"Yes, I am. I admit that. But that doesn't mean I don't love you. Give me a chance, please. Just one more." He pleaded, his eyes so full of regret, and sadness.

You sigh, because no matter how much you tell yourself that you don't want him anymore. You really can't imagine a life without him. "Fine, Sebastian. Get in the car."

"Thank you! Oh thank you so much!" He gets in on the passenger seat and gives you a quick kiss on your cheeks "I swear I won't let you down!"

Of course, another lie. But you didn't know that. Not yet.  
\---

 

Wattpad: SebsLips  
Facebook: Sebastian Stan PH


	4. Chapter Four

Last night was a complete blur. Sebastian's pleads kept you up all night, until you decided that it's time for you to pick yourself up. So you agreed to let Sebastian help you get better, because what he did... fucked with your head. He asked if he could stay the night at your place, and you said yes, probably the worst decision you ever made. But nothing happened, you slept in your room and he slept on the couch. Nothing.

You wake up to the smell of bacon and toast... and a faint smell of coffee. You start to look around, everything seems to be at its place. No trace of Sebastian coming in your room in the middle of the night. You stood up slowly, rubbing the sleep off your eyes, and carefully went downstairs.

"Hey, lovely, good morning." A familiar voice echoed in your house. "I made bacon, toasties and coffee.. want me to prep these up for you?" he continued, you just stood there leaning on the kitchen door staring at this beautiful disaster of a man, wondering why he started cheating. You frown at the thought and mentally slapped yourself because Sebastian is in your kitchen, making you breakfast... He is trying to make you feel better. You better square up.

"Hey... hey stop staring at my butt. Do you want breakfast or not?" Ah, there's the Sebastian you knew. He dropped what he was doing and walked towards you, pulling your waist closer to him, you look up to his ocean blue eyes, "Look, I know what you're doing. I'm giving you another chance, but I'm never gonna forgive you. You understand that, right?" You said, looking down and leaning your head to his chest.

"I understand.. Completely. I wouldn't forgive myself either if I was in your position. But at least let me try.." he kissed the top of your head, "...let me try to help you. This isn't about me begging for forgiveness, love.." He pushed you gently and lifted your chin up so you can look him in his eyes. "This is about you, learning how to love yourself all over again. "

He goes to kiss your forehead and smiles at you, "So... Breakfast?" 

You nod at him and smiled, walking over to the table to sit. "Aren't you gonna eat breakfast?" You asked as he hands you your food.

"No, I just drank some coffee, I need to go to work."

"This early? Your bar doesn't open until two in the afternoon.. It's only 11 am?"

"Yeah... Well.. I-uhh.. I gotta go..." He struggled to get his words out, "...I gotta go pick up.. uhh-- some paper works for the bar.. It's just a short appointment at the hotel.. Y'know.. Business stuff. Don't worry about it." He explained, you begin to suspect something is up but quickly shoved those thoughts away. Sebastian leaned down to kiss the top of your head, 

"I need to go, hun. I'll see you later?" 

"Yeah, drive safe."

"Oh, you still have my number, right?" He yelled from the living room.

"Hhmm.. I think I do. Just call me." You responded, and you heard the front door slam shut.

Work. At eleven in the morning. That seems so suspicious.

You quickly got to your phone and dialed Chris' number.

"Hey, doll.."

"Chris!! Does Mr. Stan have an appointment later at maybe.. 11:45? Or 12?" You asked, desperate to know the truth.

"Oh... Well, here I see he has an appointment later at around 12:30 with his investors. Why?" You hear Chris say at the end of the line.

"Nothing.. He just left the house. And before you even say anything.. no we did not do anything stupid. He made me breakfast though."

"Stupid girl.." You hear Chris laugh, and you roll your eyes. "11? It only takes about 20 or 30 minutes to get here.. He's got at least an hour of free time." 

"Exactly, Chris.. Please, please call me if he's still not there in 30 minutes.. I swear I'm gonna flip out." 

"Okay.. I'll call."

You hung up the phone and run your hands through your hair in frustration. He said he's changed... You just hope he's telling the truth. Just hope.


	5. Chapter Five

You began to feel anxious as time passed by, pacing back and forth your living room. So many things running through your head, it makes you nauseous. It's now 11:49 am and Chris hasn't called yet, you glanced at your phone just to see... nothing. You sigh and sat down on the couch, you could feel this rush of anger and fear and.. paranoia, you were never like this before. Time gap didn't matter to you, what did matter is; if Sebastian is lying to your face again. You have to know, he owes you that much.

You jolt up when you heard that familiar ringtone, your hands couldn't move fast enough, phone almost dropping and you answered, "Chris?! Please.. please tell me he's there.."

"I'm sorry, doll.. He's still not here." Chris said, his voice so apologetic, he worries and you know that. 

"No.. no.. Chris, please.. Check again. Please?" Your voice breaks, you feel your heart beat go faster, a nervous wreck is what you are right now. You don't even have the energy to cry, because you are way past that point, frustration, anger and boiling jealousy is what you're feeling right now. It disgusts you, the thought of Sebastian with another woman... Lying to your fucking face. It's unfair.

You quickly dialed Sebastian's number, if only he could just see how pissed off you are right now. It only took two rings before he answered, "Hello, lovely. What's up?"

"What's up is you going to work so early than usual and lying to my fucking face.. I thought you've changed Sebastian!?" You yelled through the phone, and all you heard was him sighing.

"I didn't lie, I told you I'm going to a meeting.. I had to pick up Josh and Tyler, you remember them, right? My business partners?" Sebastian explained, you can feel in his voice that he's already tired of this conversation.

"I want you to come home here, right now. I want to see that you're not fucking another woman. In 10 minutes, Sebastian.. You have to be here." You demanded, waiting impatienly for him to answer.

"What?? I can't go back there! I'm halfway to Tyler's house. You're being crazy again.."

"I'm being crazy??!" You yelled at the phone, pinching the bridge of your nose in total frustration. "..you made me like this, Sebastian! This is all your fault!!"

Another sigh. "Fine, I'm.. I'm turning right now. 20 minutes... I gotta be quick though."

"I fucking said 10, Seb. 10 minutes."

He ended the call without any goodbye's, he's mad.

Fifteen minutes passed, you look outside your window, a familiar car parked on the driveway, Sebastian coming out. He sees you looking out the window and shook his head, frowning. He walks inside the house as quick as he could.

"I'm here now.. What do you want?? Check my phone? My email? Check my fucking underwear if it's still there??" He sarcastically said, crossing his arms and rolling his eyes at you. "I told you I'm not cheating on you!! Not anymore!!"

"I can smell your bullshit, Sebastian.. Don't fucking lie to me..." You said, no... You screamed, because you're mad at him and at yourself, don't know what to believe anymore, what's right or wrong. All you know is that your heart feels like someone is twisting it from the inside, "It hurts, Seb... I don't wanna feel like this.." You said quietly, clutching your chest.

"Well what do you want me to do then??? Never leave this house? I'm trying to help you, but I can't just drop everything that's on my plate, I have a business to run and a life to live.. And for the last time. I'm not sleeping with other women.. Not anymore." He said, gesturing and flailing his hands to prove a point. "Please believe me.. You know I love you so... So much." Sebastian explained, and all you could do is stand there, speechless. Because you now just realize you're acting like a psycho girlfriend, in shame and stupidity, you shut your mouth.

"Hey... Hey.." Sebastian called, walking towards you and gently grabbing your hands. "Hey... It's gonna be fine, it's all okay.." He said, so gentle and comforting. He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you in, rubbing slow circles on the small of your back. 

You lean your head against his chest, inhaling the sweet scent of vanilla and mint, that familiar smell of his day to day shampoo.. You miss it. Your emotional self couldn't control it, tears starts falling. "I'm sorry for acting like a psychoticc asshole." You said.

"I understand you're paranoid, and you're right.. I did this to you. But you have to calm down, because I would never hurt you again.. I promise you that." You whispered, his arms tightening and he let go, you look at him with teary eyes, "I believe you.. I'm really sorry.. I'm such a child."

"It's okay, lovely.. We still have a lot of fixing up to do.." He said, kissing your forehead. "But I do have to go now, Tyler called me before I came here, and he's mad."

"Actually, I need to go to work too.. Do you mind driving me to the hotel with you?"

His eyes widened, and he stammered "What? Wh-why? I'm.. Tyler's mad already..."

"Please, Seb?"

He sighed, "I-uhh.. Fine.. But I gotta call Tyler first."

You cheered, running upstairs to get changed and your bag. Fixing up your hair one last time and headed downstairs. You didn't mean to eavesdrop on him talking on the phone, but what you heard made you feel so sick to your gut,

"No.. Babe, babe.. Please. I need to take her to work, she's already being too suspicious, I gotta do this.. I'll see you after my appointment, okay? I love you too.. Okay, see you."

He turned to see you standing on the stairs, and you looked at him, smiling. Sebastian wants to play dirty? You can play fucking filthy. You're sick of him messing with your head, sick of crying, sick of falling victim to his lies.

"Oh, I change my mind. You can go on without me. I need to meet someone before I go to work.." You said, smiling at him.

"Yeah? Uhh.. Who?"

"Doesn't matter." You head to the door, taking your keys with you, "I probably won't be home tonight, so... You should find a place for you to stay.."

"What? Wait.. Hold on!!" He yelled from behind you, but you quickly got into your car and drove off, leaving a very confused Sebastian on your front door. You're just so done playing the damsel in distress.


	6. Chapter Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sebastian's POV

*Sebastian's*;

"Sebastian!! What the hell?? It's fucking raining! Get in the car!" Doug, one of your bestfriends since highschool, drove all the way here to come pick you up, and maybe give you a ride to the nearest hotel or something. You just can't believe she bailed on you like that, and "meeting" someone later tonight? That's not like her at all. 

You pick up your bags from the front door of her house, you thought ahead because you're not an idiot, she's clearly kicking you out at this point. But it doesn't make any sense? One moment you both were okay, the next is she's basically saying to leave her fucking house.

Did she overheard your phone call with... No. She couldn't have, she was upstairs.

Right, Maggi. The other one. You two have only been together for three months and she's already showed you another world away from all the drama and the negativity, and some good fucking. Also, you lived at Maggi's place but you moved back to your ex's house and now she's kicking you out, you're basically homeless.

You put your baggages in the trunk of Doug's car, your whole body is soaking wet from the heavy drops of rain.

You missed your appointment with the investor, missed to pick up Tyler and Josh now they're mad at you, and you intentionally didn't go to Maggi's place, because you're trying so fucking hard to avoid her, and make her eventually break it off. And that's what you've been doing for almost three weeks now. Because honestly, you can't see Maggi's heart break in front of you, you're not gonna do that again to any woman.

You quickly ran to the other side and sat on the passenger seat, apologizing for getting the seat all wet.

"Nah, it's fine, man.. What the hell happened to you?" Doug asked, starting the car and drove off.

"Two girls happened to me, Doug. I thought it was gonna be all fun and games, but man.. Karma came from behind and bit me in the ass, it's insane."

Doug clicked his tongue at you and laughed, "Man.. Two girls, huh? That's what you been doing? No wonder you look like someone who does cocaine.. Jesus, Seb. You gotta take a break."

"God, Dougie, I'm trying.. You remember my ex, Y/N? Right?" 

Doug nodded, keeping his focus on driving, trying very hard to not drive off the road. 

"I made the most insanely stupid choice, Doug. I.. Fuck!!" You groaned, hitting the dashboard of Doug's car in frustration. "I cheated on her, man.. I can't say it was a mistake.. I knew from the beginning.." You sighed, leaning one the seat and closing your eyes, you're just so angry at yourself.

"You knew from the beginning it was a mistake, but the rush of your secret love affair gave you so much adrenaline, the sneaking off, the midnight phone calls, etcetera... etcetera..?" Doug asked and glanced at you, smiling. All you can do is laugh at him, because he knows you too well.

"Exactly, Doug. It was fun at first, but then she found out.. She doesn't know her name though."

"What's her name? Is she at least banging hot??" Your bestfriend joked, all these years, even months of no contact with Dougie, he still knows you all too well.

"I'd show you, Doug but my phone's in the trunk." You said, looking at Doug. "Thanks again, man.. Really. I don't know where I'd be if it wasn't for you. And sorry you had to drive all the way here."

"Sebastian, shut the fuck up. If I was the one to call you, I know you'd always be there for me." Doug smiled at you, that cheerful eyes glancing at you from time to time. You smiled at him back, but felt guilt when you thought; no. If he was the one to call you, you won't be there for him. That's how selfish you are, how manipulative. That's how much you use people.

"I know why you're quiet, Seb."

"Hmm?"

"You're thinking, 'no that's not me, Dougie, I wont be always there for you. i like parties and booze and women more than you', right?" Doug explained, eyes fixated on the road.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, Doug.. You know who I am.. like, as a person." 

"Oh, I do, Sebastian. Very well." 

"How'd you know?" Sebastian asked, running your hands through your wet hair, collecting water.

"I know how much you think so low about yourself, you're battling with your inner demons, Sebastian. And this.. This cheating thing habit you developed? You are so many things, man.. But you are not a back-stabbing cheater. That's just you coping up with the fact that your girlfriend never has time for you anymore. Like... Uhh.. What's that word??"

"Defense mechanism?" You whispered, closing your eyes in this new realization Doug is saying.

"Yeah I think so? You've grown to hate how much time she spends in that hotel, ain't that right?"

"Dougie, I dreaded those days when she would work so late. Our anniversary, she chose to stay late in that stupid hotel instead of hanging out with me.." You sighed, feeling so much emotions running, "...she said it's more important.."

"What?? She did??" 

"Yeah, her exact words were, 'Sebastian, I can't stay home, work is important to me.. So much more than our anniversary celebration, you understand that right', and then she left the house. And I didn't see her for two days after that.." You told the story, of how complicated it is to be with someone like her. "I think that's how it started.. the cold shoulder, the sneaking off.. flirting with other women."

Doug just nodded at you, squinting at the road to see clearer, the fog and rain made everything so blurry and unrecognizable. Dougie's not from around here, so you understand how difficult for him to drive from here to the city. But you still continued,

"I didn't mean to cheat, at first it was just harmless flirting, y'know.. But this girl, Maggi.. She's not from this town but we worked things out. She stuck around, until I got to know her.. Man, Doug, if you could meet her, you'll like her."

"I'm sure I will, Seb."

"So three months passed, I managed to sneak off to Maggi whenever Y/N isn't around... And then she finally found out, it was only a matter of time. Of course she broke it off." You said in a low, quiet voice. Staring outside, zero visibility. "It broke my heart, Doug. You should've seen how she was when we broke up. And lately... lately she's just being this crazy... Crazy, paranoid person."

You can feel a tug in your chest, the wounds of the break up still fresh. "Now.. Now I'm trying to keep away from Maggi, so she'll grow tired and break it off eventually..."

"How sure are you that she'll break it off??" Doug asked, "Like, what if she comes to the hotel?"

"She will... And she won't. I'm sure about that." You said, but truthfully, you're uncertain about it, Maggi doesn't seem like the kind of girl who'd stalk, but then again she is very jealous. "So anyway, now.. I'm trying my best to help Y/N get better. Like, I'm trying to change, Doug. And it's so hard! She's making it hard for me.."

"Of course she'll make it hard, you idiot. She's gonna have a difficult time trusting you again.. Would you trust a cheater??"

"I guess not..But--"

"No but's, Seb. If you want her back, ya gotta work hard for it.. Do you want her back??"

"Of course, Dougie!! So bad!" You exclaimed.

"How bad?" Dougie yelled, his voice loud inside the car, you laughed at him.

"I would do anything to get her back, even if that means I need to give her her space. That's how bad." 

"Good, now.. We're here at the hotel. I need you to please get out, cheater. I don't want womanizers in my car." Dougie joked, punching you lighty on the shoulders.

"Shut up.. But honestly, Doug. Thank you so much. Love ya, man." You leaned to hug him, your best friend, now you realize that; yes. Yes you will be there when Dougie needs you. Always.

"No problem man, now get out!" 

You got out of the car, the rain is not as bad here in the city. You pick your baggages up and say your goodbye's to Doug. You turn to see the hotel where Y/N works.. That son of a bitch, you thought. And suddenly, you felt a vibration inside one of the bags, a text from Doug, you quickly open it up,

*You didn't say which hotel to drop you off, so I took you to the only hotel I know. Please, fix what you did and stop being such an idiot, you idiot. -D*

You chuckled, closing your phone. And Doug's right. It's time to man up and fix what you did. And you have just the right idea.

\-----


	7. Chapter Seven

Sebastian checked in the hotel later that night, he asked you to come up his room to talk, with his soaking wet clothes and red eyes.

"Go on, Y/N. You gotta talk to him.. Tell him what's going on." Chris says to you, looking at you with sorry eyes. He walked closer to you and gave you a reassuring hug, kissing the top of your head. "You have to tell him."

You looked Chris in the eyes, nodding hesistantly. He fixed up your hair and gestured for you to leave. And you did. The trip to Sebastian's room is the longest you've had, "Come on, woman. You're brave and strong. Don't be a fucking baby." You whisper to yourself as you come closer and closer to Sebastian's door.

"You are a strong woman. You can do this." You whisper to yourself again. You were about to knock when you heard a familiar voice from behind, your stomach dropped and you feel like vomiting.

"Yes you are, Y/N. You always were." Sebastian said, smiling at you, giving you a warm and tight embrace.

"Sebastian, we... We have to talk. Inside?" You said, shyly pointing to his room. He nodded and opened the door, urging you to come in.

"So, look.. I know I've been a total shit to you and I honestly deserve to be treated like one. But I lov--" 

"Chris and I are dating..." You cut him off before he could even say what you think he'll say. Things escalated so quickly between you and Chris, this morning when you came for work, with eyes all red and looking like utter shit, Chris asked what happened and you told him.. Everything. That was the first thing, and the next thing... Well, the next thing you know, you're both at the back office, kissing and touching each other like there's no tomorrow. Then Chris asked you, 'Does this mean we're.. like, together now? Because I've dreamt about this moment since I first met you..'

And the rush of excitement, joy and pride flowed in you, and all you could say was a big 'Yes', kissing his red lips, because for the first time in months, you actually feel so appreciated. You felt love and happiness, just whenever you make eye contact with Chris and he smiles, you feel like knees go limp and your heart beat go faster. You don't love Chris, god no. But you like him, and he likes you, that's some good enough fucking excuse to be with someone.

"Excuse me?" Sebastian said, looking at you with such anger and... pain. His eyes began to water, tears ready to fall.

"Me and Chris... we're together. Just.. just this morning. I mean.. You and I... we're broken up, right?" You said calmly, raising an eyebrow at him. Because honestly, you can't give a shit about him at this moment. You know deep inside, you still love this stupid man to bits. But he doesn't deserve your love, because he's never gonna love you back again. Not until he stops being an unfaithful asshole.

He looks so unbelievably betrayed, his mouth slightly ajar, red eyes. 

￼

"You're a god damn liar! Tell me.. tell me this isn't real.. You're kidding, right?? You're just lying to make me feel bad? Is that it?" He yelled, choking back his own tears.

"No.. Sebastian, it's real. He.. He made me feel so special, and appreciated. And.. I craved those feelings from you.. You just.." You sighed, stepping closer to Sebastian, manipulating him. Because that was the plan, right? To get even. To hurt him. "You never give them to me anymore.."

"It's because you don't let me try!! You never let me in your life anymore! Do you know how that feels??"

"Sebastian, I don't know what you mean. I've always involved you in my life!"

"You did?? Really?? You always chose your work before me, even on our anniversary, you bailed on me because you had to go to work! It's not fair that you get to say you weren't appreciated, when all I ever did was give you the things you deserved. I loved you, Y/N. So much more than you know! But you loved your work more.." Sebastian yelled, you're both yelling at each other. Digging up the old unnecessary heartaches.

"Did I deserve the cheating too? Was that for me? To get my attention?? Well, congrats, man.. You got my attention.. And my sanity." You said, shrugging your shoulders at him, looking so done with everything. "You always claimed you loved me, but you still cheated, Sebastian."

"God! Are we at it with this cheating bullshit again?? It's done! Over!" 

"Is it??? Then why did I hear you say fucking i love you on the phone this morning, huh?? Who was that? Tyler? God, Sebastian, do you really think I'm that stupid?!" You screamed, for sure the other rooms heard it.

"Can't you just fucking see that I'm trying to change?! And just... just one overheard phone call, you run off with some sissy fucking blonde dude?? How fucking low are you, huh??"

"I can't have this argument right now, I'm sorry, I have work to do.. Chris is waiting for me." You said, shaking your head in guilt and shame.

￼

 

"You always manage to abandon me when I need you the most.." He scoffed, sitting down on the side of the bed. "Fine.. fine.. But this isn't over, y'know. I will fight for you." He laughed, sitting back on the bed post, "Tell that to your new boyfriend."

"I'm really sorry, Sebastian" you said in the most apologetic way, staring back at him but he only responded with,

"I don't need your sorry. You can shove it up Chris' ass."


	8. Chapter Eight

"You should've seen his face, Chris.. He seems... So genuine. Like he actually means what he's saying." You explained, crossing your arms in worry and guilt. You still can't believe you did that to Sebastian.

"Look, I know you still love him, and I don't mind that now that we're dating. But I was also there when he fucked you over and broke your heart.. Of course, I couldn't take you away from him that easily.." Chris said, walking closer to you, giving you a long and comforting kiss. "..you don't know how much I've waited for this moment. God, you're beautiful.. And I hate seeing you cry over him."

"Thanks, Chris.. I just feel so guilty. We shouldn't have told him about us, it's gonna kill him." You close your eyes, everything seems to be happening all so quickly.

~  
Later that night.

"Hey, I'm gonna go to bed, you wanna come?" Chris said, heading upstairs, you're staying at his house for tonight, only because whenever you see the ruins of what was left of you and Sebastian's time together, you can't help but feel a little empty inside, so cold that it keeps you up at night.

You're sat down in Chris' living room, watching whatever's on the television. "Yeah, I'll be up there in a bit, Chris.." You say, feeling so guilty because it seems like you're using Chris to get back at Sebastian. To get even, to hurt. What you feel about Chris is real and genuine, but not as strong and passionate as you were with Seb. You shrug the thought out of your mind, composed yourself and headed up to Chris' bedroom.

~  
You woke up to the sound of your phone ringing, it was probably three or four in the morning. You didn't check who it was, you just answered, eyes still closed. "Hey.. Who is this? It's three in the fucking morning, man.."

*Hi.. I just. I just wanna hear your voice. I know you hate me, Y/N.. I hate me too..*

"Sebastian? Are you drunk??"

*Maybe a little bit.. Just.. Just tell me something..*

"What?"

*Lie to me and tell me you love me..*

"Don't make me, Seb.. And I wouldn't be lying.. You know I still love you. But I need to be away from you.. You're toxic and I'm struggling to breathe. I'm sorry.."

*You don't have to avoid me! We could still be together... Work things out. Like before..*

"I was stupid before.. I'm not falling for it anymore. Chris and I.. We're okay.. I'm not stressing out as much, he keeps me grounded. And that's just what I need right now, Seb.. I'm sorry."

*I'll prove to you, Y/N.. I'll prove you that I've changed now..*

"Sebastian you're drunk, if you wanna talk.. Talk to me sober. Good night." You whispered and hang up the phone.

Laying back down on the warm bed, you sigh, now you're never gonna be able to sleep.

"You should see what he's trying to prove.." You jolt up when you heard Chris say, his voice muffled by the pillow pressed against his face. "Sorry what?" you asked.

Chris turns around and faces you, his bed head made you smile, "You should see what he wants to prove to you.. I mean, you're always complaining about how he never appreciates you but it's you who never let him try an--"

"Seriously, Chris.. Whose side are you really on??" You joked, hitting him on his shoulders lightly.

"I'm on Team Us.. because as long as you two aren't at peace with each other. This will keep happening. And eventually it's gonna take a toll on us."

Sighing, you snuggled your head to Chris' chest, the warmth of it almost made you fall asleep, but your train of thought still goes back to Sebastian, you wonder if Chris is right. Should you let Sebastian drag you into his foolishness again? 

Is it all worth it? You ponder for quite sometime before sleep devours you. Chris' arms wrapped around you, warm and cozy. But you can't help but get the feeling that it should be Sebastian you're sleeping next with. 

~  
Afternoon the next day.

Sebastian called you to meet him outside the hotel later at three. It was already 2:47 pm, Chris is with you trying his best to calm you down, holding your hands and the casual kiss on the head. 

"Where the hell is he? It's already three!" You complained, crossing your arms and huffed.

"First of all, it's only quarter to three. And lastly, you gotta calm down. It's all gonna be fine!" Just after Chris said that, a familiar black sedan parked in front of you. Finally! 

Sebastian hopped out of the car, smiled and waved at you. "Hey, Y/N!!" 

He rushed towards you and gave you a welcoming hug, "Chris." Sebastian said coldly, looking at Chris with a hint of anger.

You turned to Chris and said goodbye before getting in the car. Followed by Sebastian driving off.

The car ride was quiet for a few moments until you got sick of the silence and asked, "Seb, where the hell are we going? This road is heading out of town."

"I told you I'm gonna prove something to you. Just sit back, we'll be there in about an hour."

Annoyed, you just sat back and rolled your eyes at him, you slip into a heavy sleep. The sense of knowing Sebastian is just a few feet away from you kept you feeling comfortable and safe.

~

You jolt awake by someone nudging you on the shoulder. Sebastian, of course.

"Hey, hey.. Wake up, we're here." He says, smiling warmly at you. Looking outside, you rubbed the sleep out of your eyes and yawned, you can hear Sebastian chuckling beside you and glared at him.

"Where are we?"

"We're gonna meet someone. I need to make sure you know how I've changed. For you.."

You took a clear look at the driveway of the house you're parked in, a two-storey house, enormous glass windows everywhere. It looks like the houses you see in magazines. You look at it in pure amazement, gasping at the sight.

"Whose house is this Seb? Are we gonna rob it??" You joked, laughing shyly at him.

"I wish.. Well, come on. Let's go."

You two got out and walked to the gates, it was humongous! All mordernized and classy. You snap out of your fascination when you heard it open. 

Sebastian urged you to come inside, and you did. Only to see a woman, in her late 20's, wearing a nude cocktail dress, sparkling diamond necklace hanging. She was tall and intimidating, but not taller than Sebastian. She raised an eyebrow at you, then proceeded to smile and greet Sebastian, "Honey! You finally came to visit me!"

She was about to give Sebastian a kiss on his lips but he stopped her, you felt your world stop and turn at the same time. Stomach turning into pure disgust, you know who she is. You know for sure.

"What is that?" She pointed at you, "..is she your new help?" 

You gasp, not only because of the insult, but because of Sebastian not doing anything about it. You start to feel tears forming on your eyes, waiting.. You took a quick look at Sebastian and he spoke, " Y/N, this is Maggi."

\---


	9. Chapter Nine

Maggi. So that's her?! That... That bitch! 

You took two steps back, already preparing yourself on walking out of this non sense of a conversation! You felt anxious, pain and anger bubble inside you, Sebastian rushed to you and grabbed your arms gently, "Please, please just listen.. I need you to see this." He said, lifting your chin up and looking at you with pleading eyes.

He turned and walked Maggi, and just nonchalantly says, "This woman is my girlfriend, you and I are done.. Admit it, Maggi, what we had..." He clicked his tongue, "...was just for sex. Right? That's how you feel about it too?" He said, and he does it with little to no emotion at all. If you didn't know him, you would think he's done this multiple times. Then again... he might have.

"What?! You're not fucking serious right?!" Maggi yelled, her blonde hair waving on her face. "You do not break up with me!! And replace me with this... this cheap woman with poor lifestyle choices?!" 

And you've had it, that was the last straw. You walked up towards Maggi, and out of anger, you slapped her as hard as you can, the sound of skin on skin both made Sebastian and Maggi gasp. It stings but it was all worth it.

"I don't mind you insulting the way I dress, what I do mind is you sleeping with what is mine." 

Your final words, before you tugged Sebastian's hands and head towards the door. You can hear the clicking of heels from behind you, Maggi blocked you from going out, "I can't let you leave with my man.." She said.

Even though she's a lot taller than you, fearless; you glared at her, your face inches to her's, "Move.. or you will be moved." You whispered through gritted teeth. 

"Please, Maggi. Don't make this any harder for all of us." Sebastian pleaded, but you kept your eyes on her. 

"You can't leave me, Sebastian... I need you. Please.." Maggi begged, "We were happy! What happened?? Was I not enough?!"

￼

"It was fine, while it was happening, but I always left here feeling disgusted with myself, Maggi.. I don't want this anymore." Sebastian said, tugging on your arm.

You saw tears in her eyes, saw the pain she felt. Maybe you have a gentle heart, or maybe you know what she's going through. But you felt guilty when tears fell down her eyes, she ran past you and Sebastian.

As you were about to go out the door, you took one more look and saw Maggi on her living room couch, bawling her eyes out. There's a familiar pang in your chest that you couldn't bear. This isn't right, you thought.

"Hold on a sec, Seb.. I gotta talk to her." You said, he tried to stop you but you were already walking away.

Slowly and cautiously, you approached Maggi, sitting down beside her. "Hey.. Hey.. Calm down." You gently touched her shoulder, and she flinched.

"Please, just leave me alone.." She sobbed, wiping away tears on her cheeks.

"Look, that mascara seems expensive, it'd be a shame to ruin it." You joked, but your words are falling on deaf ears.

"I need you.. to go, please." 

"Okay, I will.. I just wanted to tell you.. It's gonna be okay. Yeah, you're alone now, but it's not permanent. Sebastian? He's a fucking asshole. You can't forever be the mistress or the other woman.. You're so much more than that, Maggi. Look, I don't hate you.. It wasn't your fault. I was a victim too.. But all this..." You paused, wiping tears falling on her face. "All this is gonna be over, sooner than you thought. You'll find someone who's worthy of you. You're so beautiful, and well... If I had this house, I'd be throwing parties all the time." You laughed quietly, and she smiled.

"It just gets too lonely here sometimes. I'm all alone in this empty house, I just want someone to be with me and.. will stay." She said, sitting up and craddling her left cheek. "Maybe I deserved that slap after all.."

"I'm not too sorry about it.." You whispered, "We probably should go.. you gonna be fine?" 

"Yeah, maybe I'll travel to..." She thought for a second, "..well, I still don't know. But I will... I'm sorry for ruining your relationship, Y/N.. And for everything.." Maggi smiled at you apologetically, she stood up and you did too, "Be careful with Sebastian, he really is something else." 

You only nodded at her and gave her a tight hug before saying good bye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not the best chapter out there. But you got the point, right?

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Tumblr: iownbuckybarnesass.tumblr.com


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